You are actively hurting your own movement.
You are tearing down the progress people have worked long and hard for in the name of who can be the most radical.
And seriously? Fuck you for doing it.
- [Oppressed] people don’t have to be nice to [privileged] people- they’re their oppressors! Yes, as a group, privileged people have oppressed oppressed people. As individuals? No. And when you classify ALL privileged people as “your oppressors”, you are, in essence, saying your existence would be better without them- that their very act of being alive in the world today is oppressing you. Do you not see how small of a hop, skip and a jump that is to “it would be better if these people were not alive” to “let’s kill them”? The barista who served you coffee this morning is not actively oppressing you, despite her cis/het/white/able-bodied/neurotypical/whatever-ness. Systems of power are oppressing you. Age old laws are oppressing you. Corrupt law makers are oppressing you. Every individual privileged person CANNOT be classified as “your oppressor”.
- [Oppressed] people don’t have to be nice to [privileged] people- they’re their oppressors! Sure as a general rule no one has to be nice to anyone, whatever. You can be a huge dick to everyone around you. My personal opinion is that would make for a much sadder, angrier life, but hey I’m not your mom. But. Here’s the big, big but. When you are positing yourself as a Social Justice Advocate (be it warrior, activist, whatever) you are putting yourself as the “face” of that oppressed group(s). When you do that, you automatically become someone people will look to when they look at your oppressed group. Being a dick is only going to make people angry, solidify their views, and make them double down on the hate. Don’t feel like you can be nice today? Go to a safe space (see below), or stick to other topics, or call up a friend. Don’t take it out on other people.
- They would have hated me anyways! What kind of cop-out bullshit is this? Really, this doesn’t even deserve a response. If someone is seeking you out to learn about whatever SJ issue, then they are, at WORST, curious if biased.
- It’s not my job to educate you! YOU POSITED YOURSELF AS A SJA. You are telling people what is right/not right, what is oppression, what is privilege, what is power. You are positioning yourself as a teacher- saddle up, because now you’re teaching. Make a 101 FAQ (and try not to do the shakesville 200k word + FAQ) and link that a many times as needed. If someone’s derailing by continually demanding you educate them, even after you’ve linked the 101? Block them. Don’t want to be a teacher? Then back down from the activism. Yes, it’s fucking exhausting, and dreadful, and soul sucking. That’s what social change looks like. Take a break if you need to.
- [Insert dreadful “joke” about privileged people here, be it a White Girl joke or ‘ewww I touched a cishet today’ or *voice* posts] Congratulations you’re making your group look like an asshole. Moving on.
- All insulting [privileged people] does is hurt feelings/white tears/male tears/fee-fees/waah waah call a whambulance]etc! Good God. I literally am unable to fathom how you are so ignorant. How many people on this website have anxiety disorders? Depression? Bipolar? PSTD? ASD? How many people on this website have been so deeply hurt by “just words” that they have hurt themselves or, God help us, killed themselves? Remember when your parents would tell you to ‘just ignore’ the bullies? Remember how that made you feel, how you felt like all you could do is sit there and soak up their cruelty? Guess what. You’re the bully now.
- But it’s not nearly as bad as what [oppressed group] goes through! YES. This is right! Being called ‘fucking cis scum’ is no where near as bad as being beaten for being trans! You are right! Did you know you are essentially prioritizing one human’s emotions over another’s? You’re saying “you broke your arm but hey, some people break BOTH arms! You’re fine!” That’s bullshit and you know why? Cause it STILL FUCKING HURTS TO HAVE A BROKEN ARM. It still hurts to be broke, even if you’re not in poverty. It still hurts to be in poverty, even if you have access to running water. One human’s pain can only be gauged by the experiences of that human- not by the theoretical ‘worse thing’ that you will throw out at them.
- You are not screaming at systems of power. You are screaming, bullying, and tearing down individual people. This isn’t helping your cause. This is venting anger at a system towards an individual. This is making an individual suffer the brunt of your anger and paint because they happen to have been lucky enough to be born a little bit more “acceptable” than you.
- But they said- Fuck right off. Unless someone is throwing slurs and defending their right to use them, or advocating violence/death to people, whatever they did doesn’t deserve a pile-on of hatred. Ignorance happens. People are misinformed, ignorant, clueless creatures. Either educate them (see above), or refuse to engage.
- But I NEED to vent! This is my SAFE SPACE! Yes, you need to vent. Everyone does. This is NOT a safe space. This is a public blogging website where literally anyone can see and respond to whatever you throw out there. Need a safe space? There are dozens of moderated forums across the web, just a Google search away, where you can go and scream to your heart’s content around people like you, people who will understand why you are angry and why you are screaming, not random teenagers on a micro-blogging website. There are IRL groups in almost every corner of the globe, if you’d rather do some face-to-face breaking down.
- Your emotions are valid. Your anger is valid. Your mistrust is valid. Being horrible to people who have not actively done you harm is not valid.
eating disorder recovery is pretty fucking badass
if food is seen as “the enemy”, think about it
you’re literally devouring your enemies and getting stronger from that
Finally starting to cook for myself, I’ve realized I can make some really good tasting and healthy stuff. Just made a delicious protein filled scramble!
You fall for a boy who is so nice, you don’t think he can do any harm. When he mentions marriage and murder in the same sentence, you say, “Okay, okay, okay.” When you make a joke he does not laugh, but tilts his head and asks you how many drinks you’ve had in such a loving tone that you sober up immediately. He leaves bullet in your blood and disappears, saying, “Who wants a girl that’s filled with holes?”
Ruins and Rubble: Lora Mathis (via letlovelightlife)
Why do therapists think jobs and relationships are the key to recovery? I have a job and relationships and I’m still a fucking psycho.